Zach graduated from CU Boulder with degrees in molecular biology and Ecology in 2019. Post graduation he is still living in Colorado and working as an immunologist studying the mechanisms that cause type 1 diabetes. Growing up in Chicago Zach had a nurturing environment that allowed him to explore both his mixed ethnicity as well as his own ideas of sexuality and gender identity. He loves cooking, ceramics, and going for hikes in his new backyard the Rocky Mountains.
What does Masculinity mean to you?
To me it’s just a kind of “surface level” general term that people use to talk about identity. In my own experience it hasn’t really definied any of my attributes but rather was a gentle platform from which once can explore the textures, mountains, and valleys of ones landscape. If we are talking about it traditionally you could say femenimity is the other side of that landscape but to say these base’s exist only on a straight line I don’t think is completely accurate either. In short, it’s a starting point to a much richer environment.
Where in history has the meaning become cloudy?
In world history we learn that in some societies the role wasn’t always so binary and didn’t follow some of the cultural norms hetero western society has crafted. I would say though what set the most precedent for the current meaning is the popularity of organized religion. I believe the family dynamics and moral try to convey are beneficial, but when you combine that with late stage capitalism I feel you loose a lot of flexibility and we get to this very marketable and very easy to swallow but unachievable idea of a man’s man. That inability to match many peoples reality to this wrapped up idea I think is where things become cloudy.
What could or should masculinity be then?
I don’t know. I have my own opinions/ideas and they all makes sense in my mind. I don’t know if i can piece it together saying it aloud right now. However, like I said before I don’t think of gender or sexuality as two sides of a line but more a field with lots of nooks and crannies we have an obligation to explore. Masculinity just like fememinity for me is an obligation to find what works for you.
Is there a masculine person you’re trying to become?
Not really. I know a lot of dudes who fit the traditional ideals of a man; machismo ozzing from them with a cool swagger and level heas. But there’s not a solid masculine figure in my mind that I want to emulate or even strive to be. I’m really just trying to figure myself out without having to worry about where my journey of personality started.
If it’s not about becoming a particular masculine person, are there ideals you’re working towards?
Hard working. I feel like it’s a term associated with masculinity sometimes in a negative light. The man of the family is always “hard working” trying to support his family and not really having time to spend with them. It’s a good thing though. In general though, I feel like all men should work towards acceptance of other men’s bodies. It’s the features and characteristics that define us and should be more widely accepted.
It’s all very hard to talk about. Masculinity is not talked about all that much so I don’t know if all my answers make sense. Unfortunatley the vocabulary isn’t in circulation enough and it doesn’t feel like a thing society is working towards elevating.
Do you think it should be a priority?
I don’t know. There’s a lot of other things going on in the world. I’d like to see some more research or polling on issues surrounding masculinity.
Is there anything else you want to add?
Not really
Well I wanted to ask you a last thing. I know you were really quirky and did your own thing in high school and kind of still do now. It seemed you were content with yourself, but did you ever want to become that more macho, popular guy?
Yeah I think there is always a desire to fit a mold but from a young age I think I knew there’s a big difference between one’s reality and what you want. Luckily I think I’m finding a happy medium. Reaching that medium can be pretty tricky though, there is a lot of discomfort in comfort. It’s like laying in bed, you find one position that is comfortable but when you lay there for too long eventually you have to make an adjustment. In many ways I do think I was comfortable with being the macho guy but I wasn’t growing or getting anything more out of life by being complacent with that. What I’m doing now is meeting as many people as I can and replicate what I like best about each of them rather just just these ideas about masculinity.
