Delivery
My wife woke me up very scared and shaken up. The nurses told us that Mason’s heart rate was over 178 and kept rising, my wife’s temperature was over 103, and he had to come out now. She had to have an emergency C section, she was so scared and I was afraid for my son’s life, I did not want to lose him. I didn’t want anything to happen to my wife, but I stayed strong and helped her calm down. I got ready to go to surgery with her, and off we went. Let me tell you, it is scary to see the girl you love, shake and shiver from the numbing agent that was fed to her with an IV in order to numb her from the waist down. She was not in pain, but you could see she was extremely uncomfortable. She started to get sick and that’s when the surgeons had to move kind of quickly because that means Mason and her were going to have an infection if he was not taken out soon. She gripped my hand and held me tight, she was so scared.
I was able to watch them cut her open, it was an interesting experience. Given I am a Firefighter/EMT, I was used to seeing blood and the guts of people. But when it is your child being removed, it is a lot different. I was so amazed by how they were looking for him, what they had to cut in order to get to him, everything. Then that is when it happened. At 6:17AM, Mason was born into the world. He cried when he first came out and I got to hold my son. My wife was unable to hold him because afterwards she had to have stitches for her incisions and we had to quickly take my son to weigh him and check him out to see if he had any issues given he had a fever. I looked at my son for the first time and I can honestly say, I cried. This is my child, this is my son. I made this little guy and he is finally here for me to hold him. I became a dad at 19 years old. Mason was finally here.
I had a lot on my plate after we came home from the hospital. The next few weeks I had multiple 24 hour shifts, and then I started to have more frequent 48 hour shifts with only 24 hours off. I had to do this for my family, I sacrificed time with my wife and my newborn son in order to support them. My wife can’t work because we cannot afford childcare, so she is a stay at home mom. This means I am the provider and that also means I have to take shifts when I can. When I came home, all I wanted to do was sleep after each shift. I sacrificed my sleep in order to work, and when I got home I helped my wife with Mason. It was difficult to say the least. But, I can happily say it is worth it.
Now
Right now, I sacrifice time with my son the majority of the week. He is currently two months old, and now I am working up to 5 days of the week, so I only get to see him two. I miss so much of his life right now, I wish I could have less days to work but we seriously need the money in order to be financially stable enough to support our family. I cannot wait for my promotion here in about 4 months so I make more money, and I can work less to spend more time with my family. It is not easy being a dad, especially since you do not know what you are doing and you have to learn. It also can be scary because you do not want to hurt your baby. I miss Mason and my wife every day I am at work, but yet again, I work to support them. That is the most rewarding thing to me because I make enough to support us and when Mason gets older, I will be able to be around more. He loves me, he started smiling at me and playing with me. This is all worth it.
My Advice To Other Teen Dads
My advice to anyone becoming a teen dad, help her whenever she needs it. You need to make sure she is eating right, she is drinking water, she feels safe and has a support system with you, and most important of all, let her know she is loved. I wish I would have been more patient with my wife and her emotions, it stressed her out a lot and she did not feel loved at all for a long time. Being pregnant is hard and something you will never understand, take care of her.
When your baby is born, spend as much time as you can with them. Time flies by so fast you won’t even realize it when they are 2 months old, and it feels like they were born yesterday. You will start to see their hair grow, their faces change, and even they start to do more like smile and make cooing noises. It is so worth it to be a dad, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. It is okay to have a baby young, that does not make you any less of a dad.
If you are having to work long hours, think of them as supporting your family. Have a picture of your baby and the mother of your child to remind you what you are doing this for. Think of being able to afford your baby’s diapers, formula, wipes, and even the toys when they are older. Think of how you can put food on the table while she is at home taking care of the baby until she can work again. Or if you are in a situation like we are, while she takes care of the baby full time at home.
It is okay to ask for help, I still have to ask my mom to take Mason some days in order for me to destress from work, and be mentally prepared for when he comes back to take care of him. Newborns are really difficult to take care of at first, they eat a lot, they scream when they have a dirty diaper, they wake up a lot of times during the night. But my god, is it all worth it to hold your baby in your arms while they are sleeping and content.
My final piece of advice, appreciate the mother of your child. She sacrifices so much and has sacrificed so much to give us a child. Give her flowers, give her small gifts, even give her a break from taking care of your baby. She needs it, our women work so hard to take care of our babies it is something we will not be able to do by ourselves. They sacrificed their bodies, their mental health, their sleep, and so much more. I can’t even describe what my wife does every day and what she has done in order for us to hold Mason in our arms.
You will see your baby like I see mine, absolutely perfect. I can’t wait for him to grow up and watch him take his first steps down the line. I really am excited to hear him talk when he turns one and then I can take him out to spend some father son time with him. He is my mini me and one of my best friends.
